Tied to the mast
…but orange now and black

Critical Mass, Vol.2

I did my second Chicago Critical Mass yesterday. It was, once again, a blast. Full of bewilderment, excitement, delight, and neck vein pulsing rage.

One couple in a car were totally histrionic, infuriated that the mass didn’t stop when the light turned to let them through. They decided to power through, and actually hit someone (not hard) at which point a large number of cyclists converged, and blocked the car from moving ahead at all. Then… the lady in the passenger seat really lost it and started to swing her car door at people biking by as the driver jumped out of his car and started to all out scream at no one in particular for breaking the law.  I pointed out that it’s also breaking the law to assault people. He told me to shut up. A few cops came up and escorted the car out of the route.

I also saw a surprising 3 wipe outs (I saw none last time). The circumstances surrounding the last of them were pretty funny (no one got hurt): There was a dude dressed up as Batman except with no pants (only briefs). A group riding behind him were daring each other to slap his ass. Finally one of the girls was gonna go for it… she stood up on her bike and started to pedal hard, but almost immediately caught the handlebars of a bike next to her. She took out the three people behind her. Batman’s ass went unslapped.

For more on Critical Mass, see my post from last month here.


Random thought: it occurred to me that it’s pretty lame that it’s always on Fridays for religious Jews who aren’t supposed to roll on the Sabbath. A closet Christian agenda perhaps? Or Catholic… maybe that’s what makes it a “mass” critical or no.


2 Responses to “Critical Mass, Vol.2”

  1. You must be talking about a different mass. The June 2009 C-Mass was the worst I have ever been on. I have been on many of the masses in the past, but this one was led by someone that others were calling Gandhi and he was carrying a large green cross. The Chicago police were also up front with “Gandhi” and they were talking on the police radio, telling the other police exactly where we were going. He was also telling everyone to stop at all of the stop lights. I wonder why this last mass traveled down very obscure out of the way streets and kept going West out of the downtown area. Any one that was in opposition to Gandhi’s leadership was called a “frat boy?” We were far from “Frat boys”, we just enjoy the past critical masses! If these future “organized” critical mass are going to be led by the Chicago Police and Gandhi and his followers, you can have them without all of us!

  2. I wasn’t anywhere near the front so I missed the whole Gandhi thing, but critical mass shouldn’t be about any one person, so I agree that if Gandhi was monopolizing decisions then that’s lame. We all noticed (my group of 5) that things seemed more tense than it had in the past though. Maybe that’s why. It seemed like we got away from the cops to me once we were out of downtown. From the middle of the pack it seemed like mostly cyclists blocking off traffic.

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